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Hey Reader,

So I did something a few weeks ago that feels a little uhhhh...cringeworthy, especially considering my entire brand is built around intentional anti-hustle strategy.

I saw an email land in my inbox from a creator with a huge name in his space. He has around 30,000 subscribers!!

For months, purchasing a newsletter ad from him had been sitting on my "maybe someday" list.

I hadn't pulled the trigger because audience borrowing hasn't historically been a good investment for me...but the potential reach of his audience was tempting.

When I got an email that he was transitioning to a paid membership and closing his free newsletter...I had to act fast because that door was about to slam shut.

*Cue the FOMO!*

I didn't pause to ask if this fit my current marketing strategy. I didn't truly evaluate whether his audience actually overlapped with mine. I just felt a sudden sense of urgency in my nervous system and clicked "Buy Now."

The cost? $350 USD...so around $500 CAD (for me). Cool, cool.

When his ad to my brand vibe quiz went live, I refreshed my stats wayyyy too many times.

The result? A little over 300 clicks. A small handful of quiz completions. And after that...mostly crickets.

My immediate knee-jerk reaction was "Well, expensive lesson learned. Audience borrowing really doesn't work" (this was my fourth experiment with it after all).

But instead of slamming my laptop shut and pretending it never happened, I forced myself to sit with the data like the strategist I am.

Now, were there other variables at play? Sure. Maybe his readers were distracted by his massive paid membership pitch, or maybe his list engagement was already dropping (which might be the exact reason he was shifting models in the first place).

But the bigger, undeniable truth was staring right at me: 30,000 subscribers mean nothing if they aren't your people.

Those readers were his people. They weren't mine.

A big list does not equal aligned list. I know this. I teach this. Which made it slightly painful to realize I’d made a buying decision like someone who’d never heard the word "positioning" in her life. 🫠

Here’s what I don't want you to take from this: "Never try ads" or "Never take a calculated risk." I will always advocate for trying imperfect things over sitting around in analysis paralysis.

What actually happened here is much simpler: Scarcity psychology works on human beings.

Even the most values-driven, anti-hustle, critically thinking people in the room. Including me. Including the person whose job it is to help clients build brands that resist those exact tactics.

I let psychological urgency hijack my strategy for a second. But being a leader in your business doesn't mean you never make a reactive call...it means you catch it, audit it, and pull the insight out of it.

So I asked myself three diagnostic questions:

1. Was this decision made from strategic clarity, or fear of missing out? (100% fear.)
2. Did I verify audience alignment, or did I mistake list size for audience fit? (I assumed. Rookie mistake.)
3. Where do I already have real alignment, and why did I look for a shortcut around it?

That third question is the one that stuck.

I already have an incredible, deeply aligned audience (hi, you're reading this). I just briefly chased a faster, louder tactic instead of trusting the intentional marketing ecosystem I have built.

Here is the ultimate takeaway: Your brand’s primary job isn't to reach the largest room possible. It’s to speak so clearly that the RIGHT people in the room immediately recognize themselves.

(And side note: If you happen to be one of the few people who clicked through that exact ad and subscribed...welcome! If you're here...you are probably my kind of people...I'm genuinely thrilled you're here. )

A massive, unaligned audience will always look shiny on paper. But a smaller, highly aligned group of people who resonate with your values, your voice, and your specific offer will out-perform a broad crowd every single time.

When your brand identity and messaging are anchored in who you actually are, you stop needing to chase quick-fix visibility. You stop hunting for size and start betting on fit (even if you make the occasional mistake experiment)!

If you've been building your brand around "anyone who might be interested" instead of the specific people who are actually going to get you, resonate with you, and buy from you...it might be time to get clear on that before your next expensive impulse decision.

I help sensitive, high-achieving entrepreneurs build strategy and visual branding that's rooted in who they actually are and who they're actually for...so you're not left guessing whether an audience is yours.

Check out how we can work together here!

Emily 💋

P.S. If you've ever made a scared, scarcity-driven business decision and want to tell me about it...hit reply. I read every single one, and I promise I won't judge, I'll just relate way too hard. 😭

xo Emily Lauren (she/her) Missed a previous email? Catch up here!​