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Hey Bootstrapper,

Tired of business advice that doesn't feel like...YOU? This newsletter is your permission slip to build your business on your own terms...let's dive in!

Last month, we talked about unlearning urgency and tuning out advice that was never meant for you (if you missed that email, check it out here!).

As you read this, I'm in the middle of my Scotland vacation. I didn't finish my home renovation before we left, like I planned. I didn't finish transitioning my business model, like I wanted to.
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But I made progress, and that is really starting to feel like success to me!

I recently came across an interview with Anne-Laure Le Cunff (thanks to business strategist Jessica Lackey!) where she shared how scientists define success simply as: learning something new.

If you're human, you've probably tied your successes to outcomes (and usually the financial ones, right?!).

But what if we started defining success like the scientists do?

What if every step we've taken in our business is considered a success because it taught us something new? Like how it taught us what we like doing (or what we don't). What works in our business and what doesn't.

In the moment, these steps sometimes feel like massive failures or mistakes.

I've bought courses I never finished, tools I barely used, and coaching that didn't align with my energy. I've committed to year-long memberships, I wanted to quit, and invested in equipment that now collects dust. Yikes!

When I reflect on these missteps, I often feel a lot of guilt or shame about the money I spent, the time I lost, and the nagging feeling that I should have known better.

But there's something deeper here, too—a question of worthiness. Like maybe I didn't deserve to make the investment in the first place, or that I'm somehow broken or not good enough because I couldn't make it work.

Here's what took me longer to realize: women have been conditioned not to trust ourselves.

The patriarchy has spent centuries telling us we need external validation, that we should defer to others' expertise, that we should rush to the finish line, and that our instincts aren't reliable. We're taught to seek permission and approval at every turn.

This shows up in our businesses when we keep buying courses, coaching, and things, hoping they will give us the answers we already possess. (As I've said before, connecting with others can absolutely help you along your journey, but only ever trying to do things someone else's way can leave you feeling like you're a failure.)

You're journey isn't going to look like anyone else's.

The dopamine hit of something new and exciting is real. But so is learning to distinguish between genuine growth opportunities and the endless cycle of needing external validation.

Learning what or who you actually need starts with trusting that you already know more than you think you do.

Your Permission Slip

Consider this your permission slip to:

• View your "failed" purchases as market research for what serves you and what doesn't!
• Trust that you're learning what works for YOUR business, not someone else's.
• Stop feeling guilty about pivoting when something doesn't feel right (especially if it doesn't align with your values or energy)!
• Build your business on your own terms, not someone else's timeline.
• Trust your gut. That voice that says "this feels off"? She's been right all along.

And remember...you are already successful...because you continue to learn something new every day.